Alright. Quick background info real quick.

My dad was married once before he married my mother. That marriage resulted in a daughter, Kate, who is 28 years old. When I was about 7 or so, maybe younger, Kates mother dropped Kate off on our doorstep..literally, and expected my father to take care of her after years and years of her mother not even letting my father speak to her. I guess her mother had gotten sick of her or some shit, I dont know.

Well, needless to say her living with us didnt last long. She went back to her moms within a few months and I didnt speak to her again until I was like 14 years old. She briefly came around to visit me and my father and then as quick as she came..she left once again.

So…about two months ago or something like that..I dunno, two or three months ago..I found her on Myspace and I added her as my friend. We sent a few messages back and forth and then she stopped messaging me and I didnt send her any messages. At the time I was doing heroin everyday and frankly, heroin was a lot more important than trying to keep in touch with her. That is my fault. I should have kept in better touch.

HOWEVER…today, I sign onto Myspace and shes sent me the following message:
“Question….how come you would find me, add me, and then disappear?”

I just told her that I had been dealing with a lot and I apologize if she thinks I have disappeared but I was in the same place all along and could have easily been reached the same way she had just reached me.
But, I WANTED to say:
Look, bitch, you are one to talk about disappearing when you fucking “disappeared” two times in my life. We talked on myspace and if you really gave two fucking shits you could have sent me more than the two messages you initially sent me. Theres no way I could have “disappeared” when we were only talking on MYSPACE and you could send me messages any fucking time you wanted to and I would have gladly replied. Sure, I dont get on myspace as much as I used to..but I would get the god damn messages and I would reply. Not to mention..hmm, lets see…
I am a heroin addict and I got busted a month ago in an undercover sting operation so I am currently dealing with the legal repercussions from that all while trying to get treatment for my heroin addiction and not go back to using illegally.

But thats none of her god damn business.
FUCK her.

For those of you who dont know…
I was busted in perhaps “the biggest heroin sting in Nashville history” on Tuesday. Yeah, you cant even begin to fathom how much that fuckin sucks. Anyway..im not SUPERBLY worried about it because there were no drugs of any kind found on our persons, in our belongings, or in our car. However, they did find Marijuana Paraphanalia. Marijuana. I could go on some long fucking rant about how much the cops suck…but I think even non criminals know how much police suck. Now, with that said….

Dont tell me you told me so because I didnt get caught with SHIT. No drugs on me, my person, in my belongings or my car..nada, zip, zero, nothing. Leslie..gone be…aight. Check my FLICKR for my mugshot yall.

This is a bulletin a friend posted on myspace.
I made a personal response to this bulletin that I will post below, AFTER I post the original bulletin. Heres the original:

Body: Why do we ((sleep)) in [[school]],

But stay ((awake)) through a [[3 hour movie]]?
Why is it so ((hard)) to talk about [[God]],
but so ((easy)) to talk about [[sex]]?
Why are we so ((bored)) when we look at a [[Christian magazine]],
but find it ((easy)) to read [[Playboy]]?
Why is it so easy to ((ignore)) a [[Godly]] myspace bulletin,
Yet we ((repost)) the [[nasty]] ones?
Why are ((churches)) getting [[smaller]],
But ((bars and clubs)) are [[expanding]]?
Why is it so easy to purchase {beer} and {drugs}?
But so hard to donate 25 cents for a {Charity}?
Why is it so easy to worship a {Celebrity}?
But very difficult to engage with {God}?
Think about it, are you going to repost this?
Are you going to ignore it, cause you think you’ll get laughed at?
Repost this as “dont read if ur immature ….seriously”
80 % of you wont repost this.
The Lord said:
“If you deny me in front of your friends, I will deny you in front of my Father

And, my response ^_^ :
This was in my bulletin box! All due respect goes to the people who believe in Christianity, Jesus, and all things Abrahmic, however, some of us do not. So, I will gladly answer the questions posed in this bulletin from my perspective!

Everything I type will be inbetween ::::these::::

Body: Why do we ((sleep)) in [[school]], :::Because our education system is so underfunded and primitive there are no new, innovative, interactive and INTERESTING ways to teach school. In order to learn something, one has to be interested in it. Schools do not make anything interesting for the students, therefore, they dont learn:::

But stay ((awake)) through a [[3 hour movie]]? :::Because it is interesting and it holds our interest, unlike school.:::

Why is it so ((hard)) to talk about [[God]], ::::I dont find it hard to talk about God at all, its just that, living in the buckle of the Bible belt, the idea of “God” and what “God” is, is very very narrow and trapped inside of an ages old box that no one here has the willpower or the bravery to break open. People are indirectly forced to blindly believe in something and never challenge it. I challenge things. I challenge man made ideals about what God is. I challenge the beliefs and the believers of a man made religion. Christianity is a man made religion. Most Christians havent the slightest idea about the true history of Christianity and condemn you to hell before you can even begin to try and teach it to them, yet they are so quick to “witness” their misguided truths to you.::

but so ((easy)) to talk about [[sex]]? :::There is absolutely nothing wrong with sex. Sex is a natural occurrence, a human NEED, just like sleeping or eating. A positive, healthy sex life has positive physical and mental benefits. In our society, sex is either talked about in a negative way..or not talked about at all. There is no positive sex education here, only sexual miseducation. American mass media fills our youths heads full of sexual ideas about how a woman should look, how much she should weigh, how a man should treat her. American mass media essentially fucks up our ideas about beauty and sex from a very young age. Sex NEEDS to be talked about.:::

Why are we so ((bored)) when we look at a [[Christian magazine]], ::::Because I find the same ol rehashed “modern” Christian babble to be the most boring, false dribble ive ever read in my life. Now, if a Christian magazine one day decided to write articles about the first Ecumenical Councils, the Council of Nicea, The Great Schism, etc..then I would LOVE to read them. But they dont, they are filled with simple minded propaganda…they are filled with myths to manipulate the masses.:::

but find it ((easy)) to read [[Playboy]]? ::::I dont know anyone who even reads Playboy, but, I could say that this is a direct outcome of the moronic ideas the American Mass Media pumps into the minds of our youth regarding ideas of sexuality and beauty.:::

Why is it so easy to ((ignore)) a [[Godly]] myspace bulletin, ::: I am not ignoring this one. However, most “Godly” bulletins are filled with simple ideas from one viewpoint. Simple “CHRISTIAN” ideas. I am neither simple, nor Christian.:::

Yet we ((repost)) the [[nasty]] ones? :::I dont repost any nasty bulletins but I could definitely say that this is also a direct repercussion of what mass media is instilling into our youths:::

Why are ((churches)) getting [[smaller]],::::Because people are coming to their senses and realizing that NOTHING taught in modern American “Christianity” has anything to do with real early Christianity and, in fact, keeps true Christianity under wraps because it promotes individuality and deep spirituality. What is taught in church now is a product of MAN. It has nothing to do with God. Read your history.::::

But ((bars and clubs)) are [[expanding]]? ::::Because as human beings, we desire pleasure. Its not that bars and clubs are the only things that can give us pleasure..spirituality and God can also give us pleasure. However, some of us simply arent satisfied with the same rehashed crap pulverized into our brains over and over and over again. There is a LIMITLESS amount of knowledge that exists within this mass consciousness. What the MEN who preach “Christianity” in this modern world would LIKE me to believe as truth, well, I know otherwise and I am not dumb enough to simply believe it blindly without questioning, studying, and doing my research. Anyway..whats wrong with bars and clubs?:::

Why is it so easy to purchase {beer} and {drugs}? ::::Why shouldnt it be? Who says these things are wrong? We are human beings, we desire pleasure. One does not have to relate the consumption of alcohol and drugs to God, but they also CAN be related and have been for centuries. As a matter of fact, throughout history many cultures have consumed alcohol and drugs as a means to build a bridge TO God and TO the divine. The Mazatec Indians use Salvia, the Bwitists use Iboga, Native American Tribes use a multitude of entheogens, “Soma” from The Vedas is thought to be the Amanitas Muscaria mushroom, different species of mushrooms are also used by natives of Papua New Guinea. Research is being conducting now among scholars who believe that the “manna” referred to in the Old Testament was actually Psylocibin Mushrooms (P. cubensis). The physical descriptions of Manna, as well as the cultivation and harvesting methods described in the Bible are identical to those of Psilocybin Mushrooms(P. cubensis). Manna means “Bread of the Gods” just as the Mayan word TEONANACATL, the Greek word AMBROSIA, the Sanskrit word SOMA, which all describe Psylocibin Mushrooms of varying species, but mostly P. cubensis, which are still consumed today. It is social stigma and moral subjectivity which have made “drugs” a bad thing, and in may circumstances if not used correctly they can be bad. But, if used negatively…what ISNT bad? “Beer and drugs” may be looked upon by modern society as completely bad and separate from God..but who is to dictate that, really?:::

But so hard to donate 25 cents for a {Charity}? ::::I have never personally come across someone who would not donate 25cents to charity, but perhaps this could be due to the outing of many charities as false. The news that so many so called “charities” dont really donate the money to just causes at all, but pocket the money. Perhaps in todays society greed has gone so far to everyones head that no one knows who to trust.:::

Why is it so easy to worship a {Celebrity}? ::::Again, this completely has to do with the subliminal brainwashing of the masses by the American Mass Media.:::

But very difficult to engage with {God}? :::Because most people are not educated about God. In this country, people are only given one view of God, one definition. They grow up Christian, are familiar with it, and due to all of the fire and brimstone threats they are afraid to question it or look elsewhere. If I was taught that God could possibly condemn me, his own creation, his creation created in likeness of him, to a lifetime of suffering in hell, I would find it very hard to talk to him too.:::

Think about it, are you going to repost this? :::I most definitely am.:::

Are you going to ignore it, cause you think you’ll get laughed at? :::Most certainly not. I hope that I will educate someone by reposting this:::

Repost this as “dont read if ur immature ….seriously” :::No. I will repost it as something different.:::

80 % of you wont repost this.

I would absolutely LOVE to see someone post a rebuttal.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

I just came across this radio interview with a man named Larry Nichols who worked alongside Bill Clinton for a very long time inside of the Government. And, Wow. Just. Wow. The things said in this interview are absolutely insane. You have to hear it.

http://www.nw0.info/files/Radio/Alex%20Jones%20Radio%20Archive/2008/February/aj_2008-02-07.mp3

Let it load all the way, and then skip to about the center…listen for a man with a raspy voice. The things that the Clintons have been doing throughout their political career…whew. My, my, my.  I know that recently there is a lot of talk about the church Obama belongs to…that is a grain of salt in the ocean in comparison to the shit that will be heard here. Larry Nichols is an ex special forces CIA operative who worked with the Clintons until he found out that Cocaine was being imported via Mena, Arkansas. He talks about that, he talks about the murder of a farmer whos daughter Bill Clinton was fucking, the farmer was gonna go public with the affair…I mean..its crazy shit. Really sad. These are an extremely corrupt people. There is a part of me that feels sorry that Hillary is involved in this, but thats just it..she IS a part of all of this. My reasons for disliking her before were trivial, menial. Silly. As a matter of fact, I liked her and hoped that she could possibly be vice president. Not anymore. The Clintons need to be kept out of office.

Tonight, I was talking to a friend of mine who has been having some struggles with depression lately. Now, most of you who know me are probably saying “uh oh!” hahaha. I suffered with depression every minute of my teenage life. I was diagnosed as Bipolar Disorder/Manic Depression and Generalized Anxiety Disorder (which turned into Panic Disorder just a little less than a year ago) at a very young age. This was something that, in time, I learned to celebrate. I know, that sounds weird, right? Well…it is a part of who I am and everything that has made me who I am is worth celebrating. Not just the good stuff, but the bad stuff too because those things taught me some extremely important lessons.
I know how hard depression can be. Chemical or situational..its very rough. I have grown much bigger than my Bipolar Disorder. This in no way means that I do not feel depressed anymore, or that I do not ever feel manic anymore. It just means that I have learned to identify my symptoms and work through them. Not everyone is this lucky.

Now, with all of that said..I do not EVER party with the pity partyers. I do not sugar coat things for them, I do not give in to their pity partying. I dont party with ‘em. I am not going to oblige them. Theres no reason to. That isnt help. They dont need someone to say “ohhh oh my gosh, I am like, sooo sorry, you poor baby.” That shit doesnt help. It makes them worse, it makes them wanna cry some more. They need a fat hit of reality, even if it sounds completely rude. It doesnt mean I dont care, it doesnt mean they cant cry on my shoulder. It just means im NOT GONNA LIE. Reality doesnt lie.

So, onto the point of my story. I was conversing with a friend of mine who has had some problems with depression recently. I think that he is also dealing with quite a bit of self pity. I was just suggesting things that could possibly make him feel better and it hit me..MASSAGE! Its called massage THERAPY for a reason. I told him “You need to go get a massage! It will make you feel soooooo much better. The power of human touch is A-MAZING!”
His response was:

heh thers only one person ill let touch me and that a significate other lmao (sic)

My response to this was “Wow. Thats really fucking stupid. No offense.” Lmfao. Dont you love it when someone says something completely offensive and then says “no offense” at the end? I am guilty as charged on that one, over, and over, and over again. Yeah, anyway…I said “Dont ever underestimate the power of human touch. Its extremely powerful. Immensely powerful. There is NO need to sexualize human contact. Human contact is essential to our mental and physical health.”
So he said”

lol i guess you can see it that way but growing up without affection, if a female puts her hand on me my heart will flutter and if a guy does he must want to get hit (sic)

My response was “Guess what? Thats part of being human.” He told me that touch is a very personal thing to him. Well, touch is a personal thing to everyone, as it should be, because it is very powerful, however, just because something is personal or even sacred…that doesnt mean that it should be reserved and hidden. Not to mention that one would think that if someone is depressed and has stated verbally that they hate the way they feel and they want to feel differently…they would be willing to try just about anything. I supplied him with a few links about the power of human touch.

He says:

well ill just keep having logic failures and wait to be touched untill i find someon (sic)
well i grew up without a father, my mom maybe hugged me twice, and my bother and sister were much younger than me, and we moved all the time. what does this have to do with anything. maybe having touch from anyone other than who i want it from feels rather alien like a guinnee pig running up your pants(sic)

Now, here is where I will discontinue the conversation between my friend and I and get into my rant. There is no reason why being touched by someone should feel alien. Now, I realize that there could be trauma in many peoples lives that changes the way they feel about being touched and this is not what im talking about. That is a whole different situation that you wont find me discussing here.
In our “advanced” Western society, it feels alien to us to be touched by another human being that is not someone we are fucking. This simply is not the way things should be. We have forgotten about one another. We have forgotten how important it is to just hug each other once in a while. In a society that is so technologically advanced, we have abandoned ourselves spiritually. We have been left to fend for ourselves alone in this world, without the aid of our brothers and sisters because we have sexualized the human body and human touch so much that it has become taboo to embrace someone when they desperately need it. If two men hug, they are “gay” (as if being gay is some horribly negative thing). If two women hug, all the sudden they are lesbians who were only put upon this Earth as sexual objects of perverted 40+ year old mens desire. Its absolutely devastating that we have been so thoroughly brainwashed into abandoning each other. There are societies that have existed upon this earth for centuries that have entire medicinal arts based solely upon touch and the energy that is passed between two humans when they touch. There are martial arts based completely on the energy that flows throughout everything in our universe, including our own bodies.

The benefits of human touch are not only hailed in “alternative” Eastern medicinal practices, but in our own Western medicine as well.

I hate that our society has put such sexualized stigmas and taboos on touching each other. The positive energy passed between two human beings when they exchange touch is so powerful, it is love and I think that it is painfully obvious that our world needs as much love as possible right now. Hug someone today. Hug someone that you normally would not hug, I can PROMISE you that it will not only make your day, but it will make theirs too!

If you guys would like to learn more about how essential touch is, check out the following links:
Pleasure/Power
WebMB Power of human touch.
Reiki using human touch

^_^

WHY DONT CHRISTIANS BOTHER TO LEARN ANYTHING ABOUT THEIR RELIGION???? Why do they blindly believe everything they are told? Its easy to do HISTORICAL RESEARCH, why dont they? Why dont Christians bother to READ anything about their religion, its history, its theology, why? I dont get it. Its retarded, just like Christians!

This is the last I will be posting about this. But, I left a comment over there long enough to be an entry..so..here we go..
This is in response to someone calling me a TGO fan. Which, im not. Lmfao. I dont hate him, I dont care that he talks shit about people. The people he talks shit about completely give him the power. Everytime they post a comment on his page (which they do, multiple times a day) it gives him the power. So, there is no one to blame there but themselves. I dont know TGO. Ive never spoken to him anywhere other than the handful of comments I have left at his site. But, you know, to those crazy asses think  any one who talks to TGO and who doesnt condemn TGO is obviously fucking him. ::eyeroll.

Yeah. Im such a fan I come here everyday and comment on your site every single day MULTIPLE times like she does, like toothless does and like every other hack fucking psycho does. What a fucking moron. Yeah, they banned me because I called Chrissy aka im engaged to someone ive met 4 times in my whole entire life a fat fuck, as if shes NEVER heard that before.
Bottom line..the reason I did all that in the first place, isnt because I hate Chrissy, or because I hate anyone on that site. But because that place is a “safe haven” for a select few stupid fucks to live out their fantasy of having control and power as they sit behind some moderator ability. Im not talking about Jenn. I REALLY like Jenn, I think shes a good woman, takes good care of her kids, and has cut out a great life for herself. Im talking about the 13 other dumb bitches on Lavish who wish they could be just like her. Jenn has allowed me to openly disagree with her on her page and thats something I GREATLY admire. She doesnt have to allow me to say ANYTHING on her site, and shes really not argumentative. She just corrects me if theres been miscommunication and its a nice lil debate. Chrissy, Sewwy, Tabi, and every other chick on Lavish who looks JUST LIKE THEM (have you ever noticed that? Maybe its just because they all only TAKE PICTURES OF THEIR FACES) try and bully every person on that forum who doesnt see eye to eye with they do and has enough figurative balls to fuck them in the ass until they all bleed. If youre not talking about how you had phone sex with your pretend boyfriend, bleeding out of your cunt or kissing their double wide asses..they dont like you. Welp, guess what? I dont like them either and I think its complete bullshit that they sit there and try to bully ever girl who comes to that page just trying to have a fucking conversation. It shows some serious lack of self confidence or SOMETHING on their part to allow themselves to sit back and throw around some PRETEND power, PRETEND like the dick they PRETEND to get on the phone, PRETEND like their boyfriend and PRETEND like their lives.

It also shows how RETARDED some people can be by making judgments based upon whos site I go to, or who is in my link exchanges, etc. As if I gave two shits who respected me in the first place. I shit that respect out of my ass. And, I am posting this on YOUR site, Tgo, because I KNOW they will read it because they cant seem to keep your name out of their mouths.

My cousin posts on Lavish.nu and damn near every one of her posts gets ignored because shes not kissing their ass, starting drama, talking about an internet boyfriend, or talking about how she hates her ovaries or some other stupid bullshit. That right there shows what the girls over there are about. The first post I ever made there, pretty much, I pissed off the “top string” Lavish bitches, other than Jenn, who I respect. Since then, they all followed me around to every post I made and made every attempt at insulting me, and when that didnt work, when I shit their attempts at insulting me out their ass like I shit everything else out my ass, I got locked..and banned. Because I didnt bend and buckle to them. Welp, hate it for them that they cant do much about me posting here or at my own site. Theyll just have to sit and cry together on Lavish because im SURE thats what theyre going to be doing, like they do every, single day. If they need to gather in some pussy pow wow over on Lavish.nu to make themselves feel better…go right ahead. They will not be missed.

Ive got a not so serious bone to pick, lmfao.
Ok, some quick background info on this entry….I am member of a message board called lavish.nu. Ive been reading the board for, forever. Probably since its inception and I decided to become a member, I dunno..maybe a month or so ago. Maybe more. Im really bad with time.
Anyhow, I quickly learned that there is no such thing as a “discussion” on that board. No one can “discuss” anything without it turning into a really, really retarded argument somewhere down the line.
I posted a thread about an idea that I had, about a collaborative photography website dealing with the expression of physical spiritual love and the human form. I asked for peoples opinions on my idea, and instead of getting opinions…I get people trying to start an argument about it. You can actually check out the thread here.

You will see there that the first response I got was…”whats the purpose.” Instead of “I think that idea blows chunks.” Or “Thats a pretty cool idea!” Instead of actually answering my question and posting an opinion, they tried to start an argument regarding the point of the project. Thats not really what I asked. A girl named Chewnicorn was the only person who actually GAVE me an opinion, which I really appreciate. I wasnt asking these people to be a part of it. I wasnt asking them to get into the theology of my idea, lmfao. All I asked for..was..”that fucking sucks!” or “sounds ok.” Or maybe even…”sounds cool.” But, no. That is much, much too complex for the members of lavish.nu.

This is something you will find ALL OVER lavish. Someone starting a thread and just wanting to have a discussion about something and either someone immediately starts an argument about it (in my case) or someone posts their own person opinion and then someone else takes it upon themselves to get offended and start crying and that just starts a whole hailstorm of really pathetic attempts at having an intelligence fueled debate and it just ends up being a mish mash of people crying, people making no sense, and then the few resident “know it all’s” coming along and trying to talk about how they…know it all, then the biggest resident know it all locks the thread. This is a scenario that is played over, and over, and over again and I HAVE NO IDEA WHY.

Does anyone else think its completely fucking retarded? Completely ridiculous that a group of people cant share their thoughts and opinions without having to deal with a couple deluded dumbfucks coming along and whining and crying about how they are offended then some stupid free for all argument breaks out and then the thread gets locked? Whatever happened to INTELLIGENT DISCUSSIONS. I have yet to see even ONE on Lavish. It gets sooo old, so quick.

Ive come across quite a few really cool people on lavish..and then..there are the three or four members who really have a big head and seem to think they are something that they really arent. Im not sure if its just because they dont have enough drama in their real lives (I know that a lot of thems lives revolve around people they met on the internet, so that would definitely indicate a lack of real life action going on) or if they just need some good ol fashioned DICK UP IN THEY PUSSY. That way they get the figurative dick out of their ass.

It never fails, it doesnt matter WHAT you post about, there are a good 4 people I can think of that will come along and somehow or another choose to be offended at something youve said and then theyll cry and then I have to ask them if I need to call the WAHHHmbulance and then they lock my thread.

They will literally argue with brick walls. If that brick wall is red, one will tell the wall its crimson, the other one will KNOW FOR A FACT BECAUSE SHE KNOWS EVERYTHING, that the wall IS in fact, Maroon. And so on, and so on. It is such an annoyance and overall pathetic. Not to mention that you WILL hurt someones feelings with your first post and EVERY OTHER post you make, that person will make sure they reply to you and try so hard to be a cunt to you because their asshole still hurts from where you butt fucked them so hard it made them bleed in previous posts.

You may wonder why I post this here…well, because I cant be censored here. No one here has the power to hide behind moderator abilities and avatars that only show their face because..well..lol, lets not kid ourselves..we all know why we rarely ever see more than a face in most of these peoples pictures. I dont even have to go there.

Well that was fun.

Edit..
Now, with all of that said, I would like to point out that some of the people on Lavish are also the most hypocritical group of people ive ever come across. They will be the first ones to jump into an argument, and then when you show them up at the argument they started..they are the first to cry on the “say something to a lavish member” thread or they just lock your thread so that they can be sure that they have the last word because, heaven forbid they come across as the true morons they are and lose their status’s as lavish.nu’s patron saints of one upping, know it alling, and being deluded.

Sodas mom is NOT invited to our wedding.  Shes a wench. I think thats probably a pretty accurate term to describe her. I dont think that I have ever PERSONALLY known a “mother” who has been so uncaring, unsympathetic and nonsupporting of their child as her. I dont know. Its a big long mess that im really, really not going into right now. I have never met her, and Soda has made sure of that for three years and for a while..it offended me. I wanted to meet her and I wanted her to be a part of our lives, but after tonight..I completely understand why he has kept us apart and there isnt a bone in my body that wants to meet this woman.

She basically throws his and I’s relationship into the dirt every chance she can get, even though she doesnt know me..and hasnt ever met me, just because she has some sick reverse Oedipus complex and shes never been able to maintain a meaningful relationship and it just eats her up and her son has something she could never have and that there is another woman taking care of her son (AND DAMN GOOD FUCKING CARE YOU GOD DAMNED BITCH). Well, I hate to break it to the cunt but…she never took care of her son. Soda says that the problem lies in the fact that he isnt growing up to “be someone” or “be what she thought he would be” or “be successful” well, ive got one big question for her..what the fuck have you done in your life? Youve never even worked a decent job long enough to halfway take care of him and his WHOLE life..hes NEVER ASKED YOU FOR ANYTHING. NOTHING.  Hes loved you, and tried to have a relationship with you for years and all you do is belittle him. Ive got news for you, when you have a child, that child is his or her own unique person. They are not an extension of you, as you seem to believe. This has led the man I love to be very sad, and very insecure with himself because the mom he had around him his whole life never gave two shits about him and acted as if she just detested him and still does.

He has made the decision to cut ties with you for the moment for this very reason. You do not make him happy. Everytime he calls you, or visits you..he comes back distraught, sad, emotional and sometimes in tears. You are a negative force in his life and tonight you finally made this very clear to him.

It really breaks my heart. My own mother loves Soda, and does so much for him. He will tell you in a heartbeat that my mother has done more for him in the three years weve been together than his mom in his whole life and that he KNOWS without a doubt that MY mother loves him, but hes not so sure if his loves him.

So, to my boyfriends mother..
Remember that every time you say he has no idea what love is. And, that we are just stupid idiots..remember that you are recalling your own failed relationship. Remember that your feelings are said in jealousy out of the fact that youve never been able to make anything work in your life. That everything you have touched has turned to shit. Remember, that you had one chance to be EVERYTHING to a little boy who needed you more than anyone in your life will ever need you and you continuously, effectively disappointed him and let him down. He says he cant remember the last time you have said an encouraging word to him. You are sad, and bitter at the shell of a woman you have become and I have to say that I derive pleasure from knowing you sit alone in your home every night and that you go to bed alone every night, and that this is the way its going to be for the rest of your life.

So, in short my dear loves mother..

FUCK YOU.

A discussion with a friend got me on this kick tonight…and once I started to think about the mentality that most people have about aliens..I started to laugh within myself at just how ignorant they are.

First. I will explain. The vast majority of Americans go to church, or are affiliated with a church, or proclaim CHRISTIAN beliefs. The either go to church, dont go to church but are Christians, or are unsure of their faith but mostly identify with Christianity.
So, a quick rundown of the fundamental beliefs of Christianity are as follows:(my commentary in bold.) A Christian believes in God. This God bestowed upon us his only begotten son via a virgin,woman named Mary . His name was Jesus. Jesus carried the weight of every human beings sins and was eventually hung on a cross and killed. He was resurrected after three days and then a bunch of other imaginary shit happened.

My version of this story is. A Christian believes in a celestial entity whos existence relies not on science or evidence, but on faith alone. And whos existence is DENIED by the vast majority of the scientific community. The next part of this story is..laughable. Unless Mary was asexual and able to reproduce asexually, we all know that virgins do not give birth to children unless theres been some HEAVY PETTING going on. However, the Bible also states that Mary was chaste. Sorry Joseph. Jesus then walked around for a few years spouting some hippie bullshit and then got his ass hung. Heres where hilarity ensues. This nigga got RESSURECTED. Do you know ANY human being whos come back from the dead? EVER? Not counting Lazerus you Chrisitian fucks, thats BULLSHIT too. Now, last time I checked, human beings werent able to come back from the dead or, reanimate and if they do..we call them bitches ZOMBIES. Was Jesus a Zombie? Thats another theory I may have to ponder. Wait, JESUS WASNT HUMAN!! I forgot to factor that in. hah. He was HALF GOD, so..it totally makes sense that he could be beaten, flogged, hung, speared in the rib cage, left to die and then …magically reappear perfectly ok, right? Yeah. It makes a lot of sense to me too.

Alright. With that out of the way I guess I will explain my situation. I was telling a friend how I like to skywatch. Skywatching is where you sit outside and you watch the sky for UFOs. She laughed and then…every time shes ever mentioned something remotely Christian began flashing through my head with the big words PERFECT EXAMPLE OF THE EFFECT MASS MEDIA HAS ON AMERICAN CITIZENS flashing in HUGE red letters. What would make a human being believe in God, specifically a Christian version of God, and not aliens? It couldnt just be a matter of faith. It couldnt just be a matter of one WANTING to believe in God and one NOT WANTING to believe in aliens, unless that person is just….completely irrational and completely incapable of rational thought.

So, what makes the idea of extra terrestrial beings laughable, when the idea of Jesus or God is not? Well, lets see.. a few things. Lack of proper education would be the biggest one, the other ones would be..social norms and mass media being the others.

Here we go now! Quick history lesson.
The earliest examples that we have of “Gods” are aliens. Yes. Aliens. Ancient Sumerian mythology (from which ALL OTHER MYTHOLOGY is based off of, including Christianity) tells the story of a race of extraterrestrial beings called Anunnaki (read: Nephilim or Giants from the Old Testament) from the heavens (read: sky) who came to this Earth in search of minerals or elements of some kind. Well, instead of them mining for the minerals on their own, they created a race of inferior beings who were emulations of themselves (read: made in Gods image) to do the work for them. They were LIKE God. But NOT God. Sound familiar? Maybe because ALL of this was transferred into the Old Testament for Jews and Christians in a process called RELIGIOUS TRANSFERENCE. Look it up. I dare you. Later on in Sumerian mythology you will even find the flood story…thousands of years before Jews and Christians penned their flood epic, the Sumerians had theirs. Yes, you heard it here first, folks. If you want to read these creation epics for yourself, check out the Enuma Elish and The Epic Of Gilgamesh. You will see just how far the plagiarism, wait oh crap, I mean…religious transference goes.

This is not the only instance in which extra terrestrial beings are mentioned and DEFINITELY not the only ones where they are put in the status of a God or Gods. As a matter of fact, this is a phenomena we see over and over and over again among most all ancient religions. It is widely accepted by scholars that these celestial beings were not invisible deities that the Sumerians and other ancients made up off the top of their head..but they were Aliens. Beings from another part of our vast universe.

Religion was manipulated by man into being a psychological weapon and changed around so that by using religion, man would be easier to control. Thus, changing the story from featuring Gods, to ONE God. After all, it is MUCH easier to control human kind when they only have ONE CHOICE.

History is filled with all sorts of religious reference to aliens and even space crafts, they are even mentioned in the Bible, multiple times.

So far we have learned one major thing. Aliens come from the sky and so do Gods and Angels. Is there a possibility that they are one in the same? After all, scientists have concluded that 97 percent of non coding DNA is extra terrestrial in origin.

Could it be that along mans journey to absolute power he blurred the lines of history and our own origins so much so that we would laugh in the face of what could very well be our own human origins? Another man is hard to control when he knows the nature of his own origin and his own soul.

Why is it so easy for people to believe in an invisible man in the sky that cannot be proven to exist, that most scientists do not believe even has the remote possibility of existing, but they cannot believe in the existence of a being that is much like ourselves, that comes from the sky and that most scientists will admit, has a huge possibility of existing? Is it easy to believe that some unprovable, omnipotent and omniscient dude created us and still monitors his creation without being directly involved, and hard to believe that a race of superior beings created us and still monitors their creation without being directly involved? If it is, then why? Does it have something to do with what is socially acceptable to believe or what “the man” tells you to believe? Does it have something to do with the way you were raised and just being more familiar with a certain view than another?

Explain.

Some further reading info that you all may find interesting:
Human/Alien DNA
Sumerian Mythology
The Annunaki
Aliens in The Bible

And check out the History Channel documentary called “Ancient Aliens.”

Quick edit..

I also think it is appropriate to ask that, when I go outside to look at the sky and quietly wait for some unknown craft to spurt across it like a shooting star, what is different than you laying in bed at night praying to a God in the sky to make your life more worth living or praying for some other Godly feat to magically pop into your life? And..whats more important is..
Lets make a bet to see which happens first.

Yeah. Shes a stupid fucking idiot.

She never fails to disappoint him it seems like. Especially on days like today. His birthday. He asked his mom for two simple little things, two things that didnt even total over $20 dollars. He asked her for a flash drive, and a set of acoustic guitar strings.

She bought him a lame ass paint set. Watercolors and a plastic fucking brush.  He dont even paint.

This reminds me of the time she bought him a camera case for his birthday..when he doesnt even have a camera. The same day she bought him one, I went to Wal-Mart and saw the very same ones she got him were on sale for 88cents. Isnt that fuckin sad?